All We'd Ever Need
by asianpersuasion10
Summary: ALL HUMAN. Sequel to "Last Goodbye". Edward comes clean about his past relationship. Bella decides that living without Edward maybe harder than forgiving him.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, just the events. This is rated M for adult situations and language,**

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"Not now, Alice," Bella warned as she walked into the large apartment she now called home

"Not now, Alice," Bella warned as she walked into the large apartment she now called home. Alice was sitting on the couch in the living room watching TV. She gave Bella a skeptical look as she saw her walk in the door.

"I didn't say a word," Alice raised her hands in defense. Bella walked upstairs and into her bedroom to take a shower and figure out what she was going to do. She walked into the bathroom and started the bath water. She undressed looking at herself in the mirror. She examined her face in the mirror. Her face looked thin and tired. Her eyes puffy and red. She hadn't slept that much in four weeks. And, she knew the reason. He was next to her. His arms were around her. She missed waking up to see his unruly hair and those emerald eyes that she thought could see into her soul. She missed him. She wanted him. She needed him.

"_Is he worth it?"_ Bella thought to herself. She turned around and entered the shower. She let the hot water rain down on her. She wanted to trust him. She wanted to act like nothing ever happened. She wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. But, was risking her heart worth having all of those things? She didn't know.

"_I can't believe this is finally happening!" Bella chimed as she stood in front of the mirror as her mom, Alice, and Rosalie pulled the wedding dress down over Bella's head. _

"_Edward is such a lucky guy," Rosalie smiled. Rosalie was Edward and Alice's sister-in-law, and soon to be Bella's sister-in-law as well. "Bella, you look gorgeous!" _

"_You think he'll like it?" Bella asked admiring the beautiful figure looking back at her. She was wearing a white crinkle chiffon A-line gown with a beaded embroidered empire waist with a sweep train. _

"_Bella, he won't know what hit him," Bella's mother, Renee, said smiling. Bella smiled back. She had been waiting for this day since she was five years old. She had always been skeptical about marriage, seeing as how her parents were no longer married and her mother jumped from one relationship to another. But, it was different with her and Edward. She knew he was the one the moment she saw him. _

"_Hello?" Alice said answering her cellphone. "Wait! Where are you? Don't move, I'll be right there." Alice had a calm smile on her face, but Bella knew something was wrong. She could see it in Alice's eyes. _

"_Alice, what's wrong?" Bella asked hoping Edward was alright. _

"_Nothing, I've got to take care of something, I'll be right back. I promise," Alice hurried leaving the room quickly before an explanation was required. _

"_What the hell are you doing?" Alice yelled as she came upon a silver Volvo. _

"_I can't do this," Edward said running his hand through his hair. He was sitting in the driver's seat of his car. He was panicking and he didn't know what to do. Bella would know what to do, know how to calm him down. But, he knew that if he told her he was freaking out she would start freaking out, and she didn't need to be. _

"_Are you kidding me? She's in there, grinning from ear to ear, ready to spend the rest of her life with you, and you're out here about to drive away from her!" Alice growled. "Do you understand what you are saying? What will happen if you follow through with this?" Alice sat there for a moment hoping that what she had just said sunk in. Then she realized what this was all about. "You do realize that you're doing the same thing…?" _

"_Alice, don't you dare," Edward warned. Edward had blocked the memory from his mind. After he met Bella he had forgotten about it completely. He didn't think he would be able to breathe again, but when he saw Bella for the first time he felt alive. It was like he had been reborn. _

"_Edward, do you remember how she made you feel? Do you remember how horrible you felt?" Alice remembered. It took him a year and a half to smile again and get that sparkle back in his eyes. "Do you want to put Bella through that?"_

"_Alice, she doesn't know what happened. I haven't been honest with her. When I forgot about it, I promised myself I would never bring it up ever again. I've been lying to her this whole time, and if I tell her now she would leave me anyway," Edward said looking straight ahead. _

"_Edward, what Jessica did to you was not your fault. Bella would understand if you just tell her. She loves you Edward, and it happened six and a half years ago!" Alice reminded him. _

"_Alice, I just can't do this. I can't start a life with Bella knowing I've been lying to her for five years." Edward said putting his car into drive. "Tell her I'm sorry and that I love her." And with that he drove away. _

_Alice wanted to run away. She didn't want to have to go back inside and tell her best friend that he brother wasn't coming. That the man of her dreams left her on her wedding day. She didn't want to be the person to tell her. But, as her best friend, as her maid of honor, as Edward's sister, she knew she had to. _

"_Alice, what's wrong? Is Edward OK?" Bella asked. Alice felt like she had a knife in her hand and was about to plunge it into Bella's heart. _

"_He left," Alice whimpered not able to make eye contact with anyone in the room. _

"_What do you mean he left? He's coming back right?" Bella questioned. Edward wouldn't stand her up. He would leave her on their wedding day. He told her he would always be there for her. Alice couldn't bring herself to say anymore, so she just shook her head. _

_Bella stood there as her hands started to shake. Alice's words plunged into her heart like a knife. "Get me out of this," Bella whispered. "Get me out of this dress!" she yelled shaking. She was gasping for air as the dress suffocated her. Rosalie and Renee quickly unzipped the back, pulled down the straps, and pushed it down to the floor as fast as they could. Leaving Bella in only her white strapless bra and panties. She didn't know rather she should cry or laugh, or freak out. So she just stood there in a trance unable to hear anything. Renee wrapped her arms around her daughter's shaking body to comfort her. No one said a word, because no one knew what to say._

"_Alice, take her to your place. I'll take care of things here," Renee said as she handed Alice the sweats Bella wore to the church. Alice nodded as Renee walked out the door. Alice dressed Bella, whose eyes were glazed over. _

"_I'll go get your car," Rosalie said finding Alice's car keys and rushing out the door. _

"_Bella, I did everything I could," Alice finally said. Bella didn't hear her. The only words she heard were, "He left". _

"Bella, are you alright?" Alice asked as Bella finally came back downstairs.

"I don't know," Bella sighed crawling onto the couch laying her head on Alice's lap. Alice ran her hands through Bella's hair as they watched TV.

"I think I did something bad," Alice confessed. Bella looked up at her confused. Just then there was a knock on the door. "I'm sorry." Bella got up slowly knowing what Alice had done and went to open the door. Edward stood there in jeans, a white t-shirt, and brown flip-flops. His hair flailing in every direction, Bella was in excruciating pain trying to keep herself from pulling him into the apartment and making love to him right there on the living room floor.

"I've got some errands to run," Alice said getting up quickly grabbing her purse and heading out the door before Bella could say anything.

"Bella, please talk to me," Edward begged. Bella folded her arms around her body not sure how she was going to handle this. A part of her wanted to kick him in the nuts and tell him to never leave her ever again. The other part wanted to jump into his arms and wrap her legs around him and never let go. "Do you not love me anymore?" Bella didn't answer. She was trying to get the thoughts of last night out of her head so she could think clearly.

"Bella, please answer me!" Edward begged as he kneeled down wrapping his arms around her thighs. He pressed his cheek against her left quad. "Do you not love me anymore?" Edward had called his sister, Alice, to make sure that Bella would be there. He hated to put Alice in such a horrible position. Trying to mend the broken heart of her best friend, but also having to deal with an asshat of a brother whose heart was also broken, even if it was of his own accord. A single tear rolled down Bella's cheek.

"Do you honestly believe that I don't love you anymore?" Bella asked frustrated with the way Edward was acting. And frustrated with herself at the thoughts that were filling her head. She looked down at him.

"Well, how can I not? You won't talk to me. You barely look at me. You push me away every time I try to get close to you," Edward said anger building up inside him. He has never been angry with her, but she was being irrational.

"Well you're touching me now!" Bella rattled off.

"You know what I mean," Edward sighed as he stood up now that he had her talking.

"What do you want from me, Edward?" Bella cried. The last time they had seen each other they let their emotions take over and made love like it was the first time. It was all Bella thought about since she got home. But, she wasn't sure if she would be able to give Edward another chance. He would have to regain her trust.

"I want you to tell me the truth! Do you still love me?" Bella could hear the pain and agony in Edward voice. She couldn't hold back the tears any longer.

"I haven't stopped thinking about you once in the last four weeks! I wear your black AC/DC shirt to bed every night because it still smells like you! That picture of you giving me a piggy-back ride two years ago is in the drawer of my night stand and I look at it every night before I lay down! I cry myself to sleep hoping that this has all been a dream! I yearn for your touch, your lips, your body against mine!" Bella cried collapsing to the floor. "How could you think that I don't love you anymore? I don't think I'll ever stop loving you." She covered her face with her shaking hands.

"Bella," Edward's heart sank as he ran to her limp body, scooping it up in his arms.

"How could you do that to me?" Bella cried against his chest finding it hard to breathe.

"Bella, take a deep breath," Edward said calmly stroking her hair. Bella took a couple deep breaths and soon started to calm down. "I'm sorry, I just needed to hear you say it. I've been so lost without, Bella. I can't eat, I can't sleep. This is the first time I've left the house in four weeks."

"Now you know how I feel," Bella whimpered. Edward kissed the top of hear head still stroking her hair. "Edward, I've always loved you. I will always love you," she finally answered. "How do I know the next time you get scared you won't turn and run out on me again? How do I know that if I tell you our family is going to get one person bigger you won't leave the state in horror? How do I…" Bella was silenced by Edward's lips on hers. There was nothing he could say that would assure her that he was NEVER going to leave her again, so he thought that he might be able to show her.

"No!" Bella said pushing him away from her tears still streaming down her face. "You can't just kiss me and make this all go away." Edward understood that. He knew that it would take more than that to prove to her that she was all he'd ever need. If it was space or time that she needed he would give that to her. But, he knew that he could not live without her. The past four weeks had been unbearable for him and he knew that they were even more unbearable for her. It killed him to see her in pain and to know that he was the reason for the pain. But, he still needed to tell her the truth. She needed to know everything, the reason why he left her.

"I'm sorry. I know that it won't fix things. I just need you to know that I will do anything to make you trust me again," Edward said holding her hands in his. "I don't ever mean to hurt you intentionally. You're my best friend, Bella. And I love you with every inch of my being." Edward paused for a moment to gather his thought. He looked down at their hands as he traced circles with his thumb on the back of her hand. "These hands were meant to hold your hands," He said tightening his grip. "These lips…" He paused and placed a soft kiss against her lips. "Were meant to kiss your lips." He then dropped her hands from his and wrapped his strong arms around her small frame. "These arms were meant to wrap around your body." He felt Bella's body relax against his own. He placed one finger underneath her chin to bring her eyes up to his. "This heart…" he said taking her hand and placing it on his chest where his heart was beating. "This heart, beats for only you.

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**A/N: Thanks for the feedback on Last Goodbye. I really appreciated it! I love hearing what you guys think. I've decided to make the sequel into a longer story as requested. So, please keep the feedback coming, it really helps me with my motivation on the story!! **

**Also, Bella's wedding dress is in my profile. **


	2. Coming Clean

Chapter 2: Coming Clean

To hear him say those words, "_These hands were meant to hold your hands. These lips were meant to kiss your lips. These arms were meant to wrap around your body. This heart beats for only you." _That was all Bella needed to hear. To hear how much she meant to him. To hear that she was the only one he wanted for the rest of his life. She wrapped her arms around his neck as her lips came in contact with his. Edward's heart skipped a beat. He knew that it was going to take some time to get back to where they used to be, but this was a start. He wrapped his arms around her waist as their lips moved in synchronization. He knew things were going to be different, but in a good way. He was finally going to give "all" of himself to her.

"Bella," Edward said reluctantly parting his lips from hers. He needed to tell her the reason why he did what he did. Why he felt like he couldn't marry her that day. "We need to talk." He grabbed her hand as he sat down on the couch. She gave him a worried look. He smiled up at her as he pulled her down to sit next to him. He situated himself so that he was facing her. He leaned forward to place a kiss on her forehead before spilling his heart out to her.

"One second," Bella said getting up and running down the hall. Edward watched in confusion as she came back with a box of Kleenex in one hand and a trashcan in the other.

"You're too adorable," Edward smiled as Bella joined him back on the couch putting her hands back in his. Edward took a deep breath closing his eyes before he began. He wasn't sure if he would be able to do this, but knew that having Bella holding his hands was all the motivation he needed. "Please let me say everything I need to say before you say anything."

"I promise," Bella answered as she leaned in to give Edward an encouraging kiss on his lips.

"OK," Edward smiled. He had never been more nervous than he was at that very moment. He was about to reveal to Bella how vulnerable he could be and that scared the shit out of him. "Eight years ago I met this girl named Jessica. It was our senior year of college and we met through mutual friends. She was different than all the other girls I knew. She was smart, funny, athletic, pretty. I fell hard and fast for her. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. She was my best friend, my first love. Then one day, she left without saying goodbye. There was only a note saying that she was sorry, but to never contact her again." Edward paused taking a deep breath. Bella stroked the back of his hand to comfort him. He took her hand turning her hand over and placed a kiss on her palm before placing them back in his lap.

"I didn't obey her wishes. I went looking for her only to find her in the arms of another man. The day she left was the day I was planning to propose to her. But, I never got the chance. She broke me like I thought no one could ever. I spent two years wallowing in self-pity. I shut out my friends, family, the whole world. I lost twenty pounds and about a year in contemplated suicide." Bella gasped at the word 'suicide'. She had no idea he had been through any of this and it broke her heart that someone so cold could do such a thing to an amazing man like Edward. She wanted to hunt this Jessica person down and rip her a new one! Bella cupped Edward's cheek with her right hand. He closed his eyes trying to control his emotions. A single tear rolled down his cheeks. Bella leaned in and kissed it away. He didn't know if Bella knew how a simple touch from her sent a wave of pleasure through him.

Bella had never seen him shed a tear. She felt sad that someone did something so bad that would make him cry, but happy that he felt comfortable enough to do it in front of her.

"It took two words to snap me out of my walking coma," Edward said remembering the first day he was able to breath again.

"What two words?" Bella asked not knowing what he meant.

"Excuse you," Edward smiled remembering what she was wearing, where they were, what they had talked about. Bella blushed remembering the first day they met. It had been one of the worst days she's ever had. She was late to her first day of work, she was wearing a black pencil skirt, a bright blue blouse, and black heels that were lopsided from a broken left heel, and she had just been run over by a man who was oblivious to the world around him. He had walked right into her making her drop her bag spilling all it's contents out onto the sidewalk.

"I did that? Snap you out of a walking coma?" Bella asked. She had no idea. She thought he looked a little ragged and extremely tired, but nothing that serious.

"You sure did. After I ran you over, I kinda followed you to your office to see where you were headed," Edward confessed.

"You were stalking me?" Bella joked looking violated.

"I was just curious," Edward laughed. "You were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen and I couldn't let you get away that easily."

_"Small world," Bella heard a melodic voice next to her. She turned and was mesmerized by two green eyes. They looked different from the first time she saw them, but she knew exactly who the belonged to. There seemed to be more life in them than before. _

_"Sure is," Bella smiled. She wasn't sure what his story was, but she felt his sadness and all she wanted to do was make it go away. _

_"I hope your day has gotten better," Edward smiled. When he had run into her he noticed that she looked exhausted and very stressed. _

_"It has actually," Bella smiled. "All thanks to you." As soon as he had ran into her, her day started to get better and better. _

_"Oh, well I'm glad I could be of service," Edward beamed straightening his imaginary tie. Bella giggled. "I would be honored if you would join me for dinner." _

_"I don't think that's a good idea," Bella said. She didn't know this guy, what if he was a serial killer? _

_"Just to say I'm sorry for running into you this morning and to celebrate your much improved day," Edward explained. He usually didn't ask out random women, but there was just something about this one that caught his interest. "And we'll be in a public place, so people can hear you scream if need be." _

_Bella couldn't help but laugh. She did like a guy with a sense of humor. "Alright, but I get to pick the place." _

_"Naturally," Edward smiled. Bella gave Edward directions to her place and told her he would be there at 6:00 P.M. "You be thinking about where you want to go." _

_"See you at six," Bella said as she took off toward her apartment._

It took Bella a month before she agreed to start a relationship with Edward. She was afraid of getting hurt, but he had assured her that he would never do anything to hurt her. He had broken that promise and now they were back at square one.

"Bella I was in such a bad place before I met you and I promised myself I would never go back. Which is why I never said anything to you before. It just hurt too much to even think about it," Edward explained. "You brought me back to life, Bella. And I will be eternally grateful for that. Before I called Alice the day of the wedding I got a call from…her. She somehow heard that I was getting married and called to tell me that I was making a huge mistake and that she was stupid for leaving me."

Bella was shocked at the nerve of this woman. How dare she try to get Edward back after what she had done to him. "I want you to know I didn't leave because I thought that marrying you was a mistake and that I had thoughts about going back to her. I have no intention of talking to her or seeing her again ever. It just made the past reappear and I was so angry with myself for keeping all of this from you."

Bella caressed his cheek with her hand. Edward closed his eyes loving the feel of her skin next to his. Her touch always had a calming effect on him. "I'll understand if you need time to figure out what to do. I'll wait as long as I have to. I just want you to know that I'll always be there for you, loving you each and every day for the rest of our lives."

"I love you, Edward, with all of my heart. You're the only man I want for the rest of my life. Just please promise me that there are no more secrets," Bella said. Edward placed his hand on top of hers that was still on his cheek. He took her hand and put it over his heart.

"I promise, no more secrets," Edward said as he placed his lips onto hers. It was as if a 300lb. man that had been sitting on Edward's shoulders for five years had been lifted off. Edward deepened the kiss as Bella's hands ran through his hair a moan escaping his mouth. He loved the feel of her fingers on his scalp. It relaxed and excited him. As Edward moaned Bella slipped her tongue into his mouth intertwining with his. Edward ran his hands underneath the shirt Bella was wearing, which happened to be one of his white undershirts. He felt her shudder as he grazed his fingers across her flat abdomen.

"Edward," Bella moaned feeling her self lose control. He had no idea what his lips did to her, even after five years.

"I know, I'm sorry," Edward said prying himself away from his angel. "We will take this as slow as you need." He wrapped his arms around Bella's body, pulling her into him. She leaned back into his chest. "Will you go to dinner with me tonight?"

"Edward Anthony Cullen, are you asking me out on a date?" Bella asked in shock turning around to face him. He smiled at her reaction. Her and Edward hadn't been on a date since five days before their, would have been wedding.

"That's what people do, right? They date?" Edward asked caressing her cheek. He wanted to start fresh with Bella. Now that everything was out in the open, he thought that starting fresh was the best thing.

"I would be honored," Bella giggled as Edward kissed her forehead.

"Praise the Lord, you two made up! I thought I was going to have to lock you two in a room to duke it out," Alice said walking in with a Starbucks cup.

"I'll let you get ready for tonight. I'll be by at 6:00 P.M." Edward said standing up pulling Bella up with him. He wrapped his arms around her as she wrapped her arms around his waist laying her head on his chest. "I'll be missing you." He whispered in her ear.

"I love you," Bella smiled up at him as he kissed her once more before leaving to get ready for the night. Bella stood there in a daze. She was about to go on a date with Edward Cullen. The man of her dreams. She thought she was the luckiest woman in the world.

**A/N: To respond to a couple comments from someone about Edward not being able to sleep since he was a Vampire, I fixed that. Stating that this is an ALL-HUMAN story. Sorry, I'm new to this and forgot to state that. Thanks for the reminder!!**

**I realized that it did remind me of Sex and the City: The Movie. haha I didn't realize it until after I had finished written Last Goodbye. I absolutely love that movie!! I guess it was in the back of my mind as I wrote it. **

**Please let me know what ya'll think!! I love hearing feedback!!**


	3. Author's Note

**Quick note, just letting you all know it might be a bit before I will be posting again. School has really caught up to me and I'm in my last semester of college classes, so I need to concentrate on that. I will try to write every free minute I get and possibly post a preview or something if I can get enough written. I apologize, but I will definitely try to make it worth your while the next chapter I post!!**

**Thanks for all the great reviews, I really appreciate them!! They definitely help me when writing. **


	4. Not Tonight

Bella hopped in the shower feeling giddy about her date with Edward. It was like they were going on their very first date. She hurried out of the shower to blow dry her hair leaving it down in small waves, and putting a bit of lip gloss on her lips. She dressed in a blue, two-tone strapless dress with an extended pleat front design with an empire waistband. She knew how much Edward liked her in blue.

Edward walked slowly to the front door of his sister's apartment inhaling and exhaling slowly. He was excited about their date, but there was the unfamiliar sensation of butterflies in his stomach. He hadn't felt this nervous since their very first date five years ago.

"Good evening, Mr. Cullen," Bella smiled answering the door. She thought he looked good enough to eat. He was dressed in black slacks, a metal gray dress shirt with the top two buttons undone, and black dress shoes.

"Mmm…it sure is Ms. Swan," Edward gave her the crooked smile that made her fall in love with him as he leaned down and kissed her softly on the lips. "You are breathtakingly gorgeous."

"Right back at ya," Bella giggled blushing a bit. Edward wrapped his arm around her waist and led her out to his car.

"I expect you to have her home by midnight," Alice yelled from the door.

"Yes, mother!" Bella giggled as Edward placed a kiss on top of her head.

…………

"How are you doing this evening?" the waiter smiled as he poured water into their glasses.

"Great, and how are you?" Bella smiled politely at the waiter who was noticeably raking his eyes over Bella's body. She thought he was quite handsome, his uniform was finely pressed, and not a hair out of place. But, then she glanced over at the man sitting across from her and couldn't help but smile at his unruly hair that she loved tangled in her hands.

"I'm good, thank you," the waiter returned her smile. Edward shifted uncomfortably in his chair, his fists in a ball underneath the table.

"We would like a bottle of your finest Pinot Grigio," Edward commanded a bit harshly.

"Of course, Sir," the waiter nodded his head and returned to the kitchen.

"Ow!" Edward jumped as Bella's foot came in contact with his shin. "What was that for?"

"Be nice," Bella said glaring across the table.

"What, he was totally undressing you with his eyes," Edward growled. He hated how men looked at Bella, like she was a piece of meat or a prize to be won.

"Edward," Bella warned. He knew that being jealous was stupid, but he couldn't help it.

They both had been silent for most of dinner and Bella hated that there was this awkwardness that didn't used to be there. She wasn't sure why it was there, but she had a feeling that it would show its ugly face.

"Edward, what's wrong?" Bella asked. Edward hadn't touched his food, he'd just been pushing it around on his plate.

"Nothing," Edward sighed keeping his eyes on his food. Bella decided that now was not the time to discuss what was bothering her.

"Is there anything else I can get you this evening?" the waiter asked topping their water glasses off.

"The check," Edward demanded. Bella glared daggers at Edward before giving the waiter an apologetic smile and a silent 'I'm sorry'. The waiter nodded and placed the check on the table. Edward handed the waiter his credit card without glancing at the bill. The waiter took it and returned quickly. Edward scribbled down a small tip and his signature before standing up without a word. Bella took her cue from him standing up and walking toward the door before Edward noticed. Once out of the restaurant Edward saw Bella waiting next to his car with her arms crossed at her chest. Edward walked over to the passenger side unlocking and opening her door. Bella slipped in and slammed the door herself before Edward had the chance.

Edward lowered his head pinching the bridge of his nose letting out a heavy sigh. He walked to the driver's side and slowly got in. "What's wrong with you?" Bella blurted before Edward started the car.

"Nothing, I just didn't like the way he was looking at you," Edward replied as he pulled out of the parking lot.

"Didn't like the way he was looking at me, my ASS!" Bella raised her voice. "You better start talking, and you better do it now!"

Edward inhaled deeply, "Why was Jacob there?"

"At the restaurant?" Bella was shocked. What did Jacob have to do with any of this?

"No, at our wedding," Edward said staring straight ahead.

"That's what this is all about?" Bella yelled. "I can't believe you!"

"What?! You told me you weren't sending him an invitation."

"I'm doing this with you right now! This was supposed to be a romantic night out, just about the two of us, and you've ruined it!" Bella had done enough crying that all was left was anger and frustration.

"Did you invite him?" Edward asked looking over at her. He didn't want this to turn into a huge fight. He just wanted to hear her say that she didn't invite him and he would let it go.

"Cullen! I. said. not. tonight! Take me home!"

Edward didn't say anything else as they drove through the streets of Seattle. He knew he'd messed up when she called him 'Cullen'. It was never a good sign. It took Bella a while to realize where they were headed. "Where are you taking me?"

"Home," Edward said softly.

"To Alice's," Bella growled. She was in no mood to be around him anymore. She just wanted to go to Alice's and sleep all of her frustration out.

"Bella," Edward breathed. He didn't want to leave her. He knew that he had angered her and he felt horrible for it. But, he didn't want her to leave angry with him.

"I said to Alice's," Bella said closing her eyes. This was not how she pictured her night going. She'd imagined a romantic dinner with Edward, the man of her dreams. They would be deep in conversation all night unaware of the world around them. It would just be the two of them. It's what they needed, and what she wanted.

"I'm sorry," Edward whispered as he pulled into an empty parking lot to turn around. They rode in silence all the way to Alice's apartment. Edward parked as close as he could get and before he had a chance to take his seatbelt off and get out of the car Bella was already halfway up to the door. "Fuck!" Edward slammed both palms into the steering wheel as he saw Bella barge into the apartment and slam the door.

"Fuck!" Bella yelled as she threw her purse against the wall slamming the door.

"Jesus!" Alice shrieked falling off the couch onto the floor. The guy on the couch hurried to pull Alice to her feet making sure she was alright.

"Sorry, Alice," Bella signed leaning up against the door. "Jasper, I didn't mean to interrupt." Bella smiled weakly at the man next to Alice.

"Jasper, give us a minute?" Alice smiled sweetly. Jasper placed a kiss on her cheek and nodded.

"No need for apologies, Bells," Jasper smiled placing a small kiss on her forehead before heading off to Alice's room. Jasper Hale and Alice had been together for five years and have been living together for two. Bella was grateful that Jasper was alright with her staying there for a while. She didn't know how she lived twenty-one years without Alice and Jasper in her life, come to think of it, she didn't know how she lived without any of the Cullen's or Hale's in her life for twenty-one years.

"God! Why can't your brother be more like Jasper!" Bella said angrily.

"Because then I would be dating my brother, and that's just gross," Alice poked Bella's side.

"Alice, I'm serious," Bella said shoving Alice's hand away.

"Hold that thought," Alice said before opening the door to look out. "Please go tell Jasper, I'll be there as soon as I can." With that Alice was out the door. Bella walked slowly to Alice's room and knocked on the door.

"Jasper, Alice said she'd be back as soon as she could," Bella said through the door.

"Thanks, Bells," Jasper smiled as he opened the door. "Are you alright?" Jasper was like Bella's big brother. He was always concerned for her well-being and she was glad for that.

"Not really, but I'll be fine," Bella said.

"Do you want to talk about it? I may not be a girl, but you know I'm always here for you," Jasper smiled.

"I know, thanks Jasper. That really means a lot," Bella smiled as stepped forward for a hug. "I think I'm just going to go to bed."

"Night, Bells," Jasper said as she turned to walk down the hall to her room.

"Night," Bella smiled before Jasper shut the door.

…………

"Are you trying to fuck things up with Bella on purpose?" Alice yelled as she yanked the door open to Edward's car. He had not moved since Bella bolted into the apartment. He was in no state to drive.

"Shit, Alice! You could have given me a heart attack!" Edward growled as he held his chest.

"Oh please, don't play the victim," Alice glared as she got into her brother's car. "What the hell happened?"

"It's none of your business," Edward replied. He didn't want to fight with his sister tonight.

"Like hell it is! Bella's my best friend and I'm not going to stand around while you stomp on her heart all over again," Alice warned. She was tired of seeing her brother hurt her best friend. "If you make me choose sides, you aren't going to like the outcome!"

"Alice, this is between me and Bella. The whole world does not revolve around you!" Edward yelled. He immediately wanted to take back those hurtful words. Alice had been nothing but supportive and helpful in his time of need and he loved her so much for it. He just let his anger get too out of hand.

Alice inhaled and exhaled calmly closing her eyes. "You listen to me, and you listen to me good," Alice said grabbing her brother's chin tightly to look him in the eye. She had never been this upset with her brother in the twenty-six years they'd been brother and sister, but he had crossed the line. "You can say what you want to me. I'm your sister and I will always love you no matter what. But what you say to Bella is a different story. Do NOT, I repeat, Do NOT think that you can treat her like shit and think that you can apologize for it the next day and everything will be alright. You know that not only will you have me to answer to, but you will also have Jasper, Emmett, Rose, Mom, Dad, Charlie, and Rene. So, don't think that you can treat her the way you've been treating her and not suffer the consequences. You better not come near her until you've figured out what ever the hell it is that's making you act like an asshole and have a damn good apology."

Without another word Alice released Edward's chin and climbed out of the car leaving Edward alone once again.

"Seriously Edward?!" Bella grumbled as she answered her phone. She rolled over to see it was 2:30 A.M.

"This is she," Bella answered. She sat there in silence listening to the voice on the other end of the phone. When they were finished she closed her phone, walking around the room in a daze she pulled on one of Edward's hoodies that she loved to wear and walked slowly to Alice's room.

"Alice," Bella whimpered as she knocked quietly on the door. There was no answer. "Alice! Please!" Bella cried as she banged on the door. Bella lost all feeling in her lower body sending her collapsing to the floor.

"Bella, what's wrong?" Alice panicked as she saw her best friend on the floor, tears streaming down her face.

"Edward," was all she could get out.

..........

**A/N: I finally got some inspiration!!! Things still haven't really calmed down, but they should here in a couple of weeks. I hope you all like this chapter, please let me know what you think!!!! **


	5. Reasons

Previously

**"Bella, what's wrong?" Alice panicked as she saw her best friend on the floor, tears streaming down her face.**

**"Edward," was all she could get out.**

* * *

"Bella, what's wrong? What about Edward?" Alice asked placing her hands on Bella's shaking shoulders. Bella continued to sob refusing to say a word.

"Bella honey, you need to tell us what happened," Jasper said kneeling down next to her. He hated to see her cry almost as much as Edward.

"Edward…" Bella sniffed. "Mercy Hospital…" Bella collapsed into Jasper's chest wetting his shirt with her tears.

"Come on, Jasper, you drive while I call mom and dad," Alice hurried as Jasper picked Bella up carrying her to the car while Alice grabbed her purse, locking up the apartment.

"Dad, I'm so sorry to wake you, but something's happened to Edward," Alice said sitting in the back seat with Bella's head on her lap. Alice stroked her hair as Bella cried softly.

"Yeah, we're heading there now. No, they didn't tell her anything," Alice replied.

"Will you call Emmett?" Alice asked.

"OK," Alice shut her phone. "Mom and dad will be there as soon as they can." Jasper nodded looking at Alice through the rearview mirror.

"Are you OK?" Jasper asked catching Alice's eyes. Alice just nodded. She was terrified for her brother. She didn't know what she would do without him. Even if he was a dumbass, he was still her big brother and she loved him with all her heart. She was even more terrified for Bella. If something happened to Edward, she didn't know what Bella would do. And to make matters worse, their night didn't end on the best of terms. She knew that Bella would blame herself for what happened, when it obviously wasn't her fault at all.

No, Alice had to think positive. Her brother was going to be fine. Him and Bella would talk things out and things would go back to normal. Maybe if she repeated that to herself she would start to really believe it.

"Edward Cullen?," Alice said walking up to the counter at Mercy Hospital. "Oh, and why wasn't my father called?" Alice wasn't meaning to sound rude.

"When he came in he said to call Bella," the receptionist explained. "One of the nurses handed me his phone for her number." The receptionist handed Alice the phone over the counter.

"Please take a seat in the waiting area," the receptionist said motioning over to a room full of uncomfortable chairs.

"Please," Bella cried tears streaming down her face. "I got a call saying he was here. Tell me he's OK!" Bella slammed her hands down on the counter, the receptionist never wavering. It didn't occur to Bella that she hadn't recognized the receptionist working the desk. She did a lot of her work at the hospital, but had never seen this woman.

"Miss, I need you to go take a seat and I will page his doctor," the receptionist replied. It wasn't a surprise to her that Bella was upset. She's had to deal with many people like this. It was always hard to see people come in upset and anxious about a family member or a friend. At times she would get frustrated, but knew that she had to keep her cool. She didn't want to upset them even more. They were already going through enough.

"Thank you," Jasper smiled as he took Bella into his arms and led her over to the chairs. "Bella, look at me." Jasper moved her back so he could see her face. "You need to be strong. Edward is going to be alright. He'll need you to be strong for him."

"This is all my fault," Bella cried.

"Bella, this is NOT your fault," Jasper demanded. He didn't want Bella to beat herself up over this. She had no control of the situation.

"It is! We got in a fight because he asked me why Jacob was at the wedding and I went off on him," Bella explained. Alice and Jasper looked to each other. Neither of them had seen Jacob, but apparently Edward had.

……….

_Jake, please tell me what's wrong," Bella pleaded as she sat down next to her best friend who was sitting silently on her front porch. _ _Bella and Jake had been best friends since the day they met five years ago. Edward and Jacob were both medical interns at Mercy Hospital. Edward an ER intern and Jacob a surgical intern. Bella met Jacob a month after she met Edward. Bella had gotten a job doing PR for the hospital after she found out she had not gotten the job that she interviewed for the first day she had met Edward. It was a surprise to her to find out Edward worked at that same hospital. After working there for a couple of weeks she had been hurrying around the hospital working on a media kit for one of the local newspapers and had taken a corner too fast falling into a tall, dark skinned, body. Since that day, he vowed that he would never let her fall again. _

_Edward and Jacob had become friends through Bella and the three of them were constantly together causing a raucous in the hospital, it was a miracle neither of them got fired or kick out. _

"_Bella, I…" Jacob paused as he ran his hands over his face. He has never been so scared in his entire life than he was right now. He couldn't imagine his life without her, but he knew that what he was about to do could cost him that forever. _

"_Jake, please tell me," Bella rubbed circles on Jacob's back. _

"_Bella, I can't do this anymore," Jake said standing up moving away from Bella. _

"_Jake?" Bella whimpered. _

"_Bella you're my best friend and I can't imagine my life without you. You've been there for me everyday for the past five years and I hope that you feel that I have been there for you. There isn't a minute of the day that I don't think about you. That I don't yearn to touch you, to have you in my arms. Only to remember that you find comfort in someone else's," Jacob said as a tear rolled down his cheek. Bella stood inching closer to him not believing what she was hearing. _

"_Jake, I…" Bella started seeing sadness in Jacob's brown eyes that she's never seen before. Her heart was heavy and felt a stab of guilt as he walked closer to her. _

"_I'm in love with you, Bells," Jacob said cupping her cheek in his hand and placing the other hand on her waist. "I have been since the day we met, I was just too afraid to tell you." _

_Bella closed her eyes as she felt Jacob's hand on her cheek. Her heart beating rapidly as her mind went over and over what he had just confessed. "Jake, I…" she opened her mouth to speak but was cut off by Jacob's lips crashing to hers. She stood there frozen. Not knowing what to do. Her lips unmoving as he tried to deepen the kiss. Bella's eyes shot open as she placed both hands on Jacob's chest shoving him away from her. _

"_What are you doing?" Bella cried. She loved Jacob with all her heart, but it was Edward who she had given her heart to. Edward was the one she wanted to start a family with. Edward was the one she wanted to marry. Edward was the one she wanted to spend the rest of her life with._

"_Bella, did you not hear me?" Jacob asked as he took another step toward her. "I love you." He reached out his hand to take hers. He pulled her hand up to his chest where his heart was. "This is yours. It's always been yours." _

"_Jake, I can't," Bella whimpered as a tear rolled down her cheek. _

"_Bells, I know you love me too. We can run away together, we can get married, we can start a family," Jacob smiled as he looked into her brown eyes. _

"_Edward," was all Bella could say. _

"_Bells, you know he'll understand," Jacob coaxed. He slowly wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her toward him. He slowly leaned down closing the space between their lips. _

"_Jacob, stop!" Bella screamed as she pushed him away once more. "I love Edward! I'm marrying Edward!" _

"_Bella, please, give me a chance. You'll see that you can love me too. We're perfect for each other." _

"_Jacob, don't do this," Bella cried. She didn't understand why he was acting like this? And five months before her and Edward's wedding. "You're my best friend. I don't want to lose you." _

"_I can't be him anymore. Not if you don't love me," Jacob said shoving his hands in his pockets. He knew this would happen. He knew that telling her that he was in love with her could cause him to lose her forever. _

"_Jacob?" Bella cried trying to reach out to him. He backed away maneuvering toward the steps. _

"_I'm sorry Bella. I can't watch you marry someone that's not me," Jacob said as he walked down the steps of the porch. _

"_Jacob, don't do this! I need you," Bella collapsed to the ground as she saw Jacob getting into his car. "We can fix this!" Jacob didn't hear her as he shut the door starting his car. Jacob took one more look at the crying figure on the porch. He couldn't help but cry himself at the pain he was causing her. If he was a stronger man he would suck it up and continue playing the 'best friend', but he wasn't. He wanted Bella and he wasn't strong enough to keep her in his life while she was in the arms of another man. _

"_Bella?" Edward hurried over to his crying fiancé. "Baby, what's wrong? Where's Jake?" _

"_He…he told me he loved me. He told me he couldn't be friends with me anymore I didn't…if I didn't choose him," Bella sniffed. Edward wrapped his arms around Bella's tiny frame and held her as she cried. He hated seeing her cry. He hated that it was Jacob that made her cry. He thought Jacob would never do anything to hurt her, but he was wrong. _

_It took Bella two months to get over the fact that Jacob chose a life without her if he couldn't have her. She said she was fine, that all she needed was Edward, but Edward knew better. He had spoken the Jacob about his decision, well more like yelled, but none-the-less. Jacob thought it was for the best and that he didn't want to be in either of their lives. Edward told him he was making a huge mistake. He didn't think he could ever be upset with Jacob, but he was more than upset. He was livid. _

………_._

"Do not blame yourself. It isn't going to help the situation. You and Edward have been through so much, and he really needs you to be there for him right now. Please, just forget about the fight you guys had for now and you can talk to him about it when he's better," Jasper said stroking her hair.

Jasper was always the one to calm people down. It was a gift. Bella took three deep breaths to calm herself as she rested in Jasper's embrace. Alice rubbing her back. After what seemed like an eternity the elevator dinged for the twentieth time opening the doors to a 6'9", dark skinned, dark haired, man in blue scrubs and a white coat. He stepped off the elevator seeing the three people waiting for him embraced in each other's arms. Bella was the first to spot him. She had finally calmed down as Alice stroked her hair. The doctor made his way toward the three entangled bodies.

"NO!" Bella screamed as she saw the doctor walking toward them. Jasper and Alice looked up to see the man standing before them. Bella shot out of Jasper's arms her hands clinched into fists as she pounded on the man's chest. "This is all your fault! You did this! I hate you!" Bella screamed. Jasper and Alice sat there in shock as Bella beat the man's chest with all her might. Bella didn't care that she was making a scene. She didn't care that people were whispering and staring. All she cared about was that Edward was going to be OK and that the doctor knew how angry she was at him.

The doctor stood there for a moment before he grabbed her wrists willing her to stop. Tears streamed down her cheeks as her legs started to give way. The doctor pulled her close to his chest hushing her to try to try to calm her. He wasn't sure why she was yelling at him, but he knew that she had a reason to be upset.

"Jacob?" Carlisle said coming up to the two with a puzzled look.

"Dr. Cullen, Edward came in after a vehicular accident. He has suffered extensive internal injuries, they are prepping him for surgery right now. I will be the one working on Edward, but I thought I should be the one to come down to tell you all," Jacob explained as Esme gasped. "You all are more than welcome to come up and wait in the private waiting area on the surgical floor."

"That will be fine," Carlisle nodded. Esme placed her hand on Bella's back as Bella turned from Jacob to enter Esme's arms.

"I'm sorry," Jacob said before heading toward the elevator. The group followed him up to the fifth floor and into the private waiting room. Alice and Jasper sat there in silence holding each other as if one of them might disappear at any given moment. Esme and Carlisle were off talking to a few of his colleagues. Emmett had yet to arrive, and it was killing Bella to stay up there just waiting. She had to get some fresh air and she needed it now.

"I need some air," Bella said to no one as she got up and walked to the elevator.

"Bella, you want me to go with?" Alice asked walking toward her.

"Thanks, Alice, but I think I need to be alone," Bella smiled weakly at her best friend. She knew how hard it was for her, but she couldn't imagine how hard this must be on Alice. Edward and her were extremely close. They did everything together when they were younger and as they got older, their relationship seemed to strengthen.

"Shit!" Bella whispered to herself as she took a seat on a bench outside the emergency room doors. Her head was spinning out of control. The one person she loved more than life was in surgery and she wasn't sure if he was going to make it out. She could never live with herself if something happened to him. He was her life, he was her everything. She had lost him once before and she didn't want to lose him again, for good.

"Are you OK?" Bella heard a voice ask. She looked up to see the receptionist from earlier looking down at her with concerned eyes.

"Not really," Bella replied as she closed her eyes.

"Is there anything I can do for you?" the receptionist asked. She didn't usually interact with family members of patience, but she felt that Bella really needed someone.

"No, thanks though," Bella replied. She didn't want to be rude, but she really wanted to be alone.

"I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't realize who you were when you came in or I would have gotten Dr. Black down a little quicker."

"Oh, it's alright. I'm the one who should be apologizing. You were just trying to do your job," Bella smiled.

"I'm Kate, by the way," she smiled holding out her hand.

"Nice to meet you Kate, Bella," Bella said taking her hand.

"It's definitely nice to finally meet the famous Bella," Kate joked.

"Famous?" Bella was confused.

"Oh yeah, all the nurses around here are completely jealous that you snagged Dr. Cullen," Kate laughed. "You should hear them.

"Are you sure they aren't talking about Carlisle?" Bella asked knowing the answer.

"Well, I do hear them talking about him as well. It's quite entertaining and a bit sick," Kate giggled. "I don't think either of them realize how often the nurses try to throw themselves at them. Their totally oblivious, I love it!"

"Well, I'm glad someone else gets a kick out of it, too," Bella chuckled. "I've always told Edward about how many women drool over him everywhere we go, and he thinks I'm being ridiculous."

"Well, personally, I'm more of a dark skinned, dark eyed, dark haired kind of girl," Kate said. She was really enjoying talking to Bella and hoped that she would get to do more of it, but on different circumstances.

"Oh…uh…Dr. Black?" Bella smiled raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I know he's totally out of my league, but he's just…oh my gosh…there aren't words," Kate fanned herself as she leaned back against the bench.

"Have you talked to him?" Bella questioned amused at Kate's reaction to her once best friend.

"Only in passing and when I have to page him like earlier," Kate said. "I just get so flustered around him."

"Oh, I know what you mean. I was that way around Edward when we first met. Come to think of it, I still get that way sometimes even after five years," Bella laughed.

……….

"Charge to 200! Clear!" the nurse commanded as she pressed the defibrillator paddles to his chest. Edward's back arched off the bed and slammed back down.

"Still v-tac," another nurse observed looking at the heart monitor.

"250!" Once again Edward's body arched up and fell. "V-tac."

"Come on Edward, you can't leave her!" Jacob yelled as he took the paddles from the nurse. "300!" Jacob pressed the paddles to Edward's chest once more sending his body upward and back down whipping his head toward the monitor.

* * *

**A/N: Sorry for another cliff hanger, I just couldn't help myself. **

**Feedback is GREATLY appreciated!!!!!**


	6. Desperation

**Previously**

"_Come on Edward, you can't leave her!" Jacob yelled as he took the paddles from the nurse. "300!" Jacob pressed the paddles to Edward's chest once more sending his body upward and back down whipping his head toward the monitor. _

……….

"Nothing," a nurse said. Jacob wiped his forehead with the back of his forearm as he handed the paddles back to the nurse.

"Come on Edward! Don't do this!" Jacob demanded as he placed his palms on Edward's chest pressing down and then allowing his hands to come back up. Jacob repeated this movement for five minutes.

"Doctor, it's been thirty minutes," the nurse said looking at the monitor.

"I can't let him leave her! She would never forgive me!" Jacob yelled as he continued chest compressions. The nurse let him continue as the long drug out beep echoed through the room.

The nurses stood there silently praying for one of the their own. They all enjoyed working with Edward. He was always such a pleasant presents in the midst of chaos.

"Come on Edward! Think about Bella!" Jacob yelled as if Edward could hear him. He stopped chest compressions slamming his right palm down against Edward's chest with as much force as he could muster. The long beep turned into multiple short beeps.

"We have a pulse," the nurse exclaimed as Jacob stumbled back to let the nurses finish cleaning Edward up and replaced the oxygen mask with a tube placed slightly up in his nostrils. Thankfully he was breathing on his own.

Jacob hurried out of the operating room pulling off his mask, scrub hat, and gloves as he collapsed to the floor. He had never been so scared in his entire life. He knew he shouldn't have shown up at Bella and Edward's wedding and he felt responsible for them not getting married. He knew that he hurt Bella when he walked out of their lives, but he thought that it was the best thing to do. He loved Bella and thought that he could just get over her that way, but he came to the realization that not having her in his life at all was worse than watching her marry another man. He was going to the wedding to apologize and hope that Bella and Edward would take him back, but Edward was too upset to even listen to his apology.

Jacob sat there for a few moments his chest rising a falling heavily as he tried to bring his heart rate down. The nurses started to roll Edward's gurney out of the operating room moments later.

"We're taking him to 312," the nurse said as she saw Jacob sitting on the floor. Jacob nodded as he started to get up. Jacob followed them to the room checking Edward's vitals and for any brain activity. He knew that without oxygen for thirty minutes there might be brain damage. He wasn't about to let that happen.

"Bella," Alice said softly as she walked outside to see Bella and receptionist sitting on a bench talking.

"Bells!" Bella looked from Alice to a large figure running up toward the hospital.

"Emmett," Bella sighed as he engulfed her in his arms.

"I'm sorry it took me so long. Is he OK?" Emmett asked as he took hold of Bella's hands.

Bella looked over to Alice who was glad to see her big brother. "He just got out of surgery. Jacob is upstairs waiting to talk to us." Hearing Jacob's name caused Emmett to tighten his grip on Bella's hands. Bella winced.

"Sorry," Emmett smiled as he dropped one of her hands as they followed Alice inside wrapping his other arm around Alice's shoulder's giving it a squeeze.

"Kate," Bella stopped and turned around before they entered the door. "Thanks." Bella was grateful for the conversation with Kate. It kept her mind off Edward while he was in surgery. She knew that Kate and her would become great friends.

"You're welcome," Kate smiled as she watched the three walk inside.

"I was just telling everyone that we repaired the internal damage, we lost his pulse for about thirty minutes, but we got it back and he's now stable," Jacob said as he heard Bella gasp. "He's in the ICU right now and we won't know anymore until he wakes up."

There was a deafening silence as the Cullen's processed the information. Lost his pulse? They had almost lost Edward forever.

"Can we see him?" Alice asked with her arm around Bella. She could feel Bella start to shake at the words 'we lost his pulse'.

"You may, one at a time," Jacob said not being able to keep his eyes off Bella. All he wanted to do was wrap his arms around her and apologize for being such an asshole. But, he knew now was not the time.

"Bella, you want to go in first?" Carlisle asked. Bella only nodded. Jacob motioned with his head in the direction of Edward's room. Bella looked up at him with cautious eyes as she slowly followed behind him. Jacob opened the door to Edward's room and let Bella walk in. Bella gasped as she saw his still body lying on the bed, tubes hanging from his body attached to the surrounding machines. Bella slowly made her way over to his unconscious body placing her hand on top of his. As her skin came in contact with his the beeping on the heart monitor sped up. Bella quickly removed her hand.

"He knows you're here," Jacob said softly as she looked back at him with panicked eyes. Jacob then turned to walk out of the room.

Bella turned her attention back to Edward taking a seat in a chair that was placed next to the bed. She grabbed his hand in hers as she rose up her free hand placing it on his forehead. "Edward, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I yelled at you, I'm sorry for not just answering you, I'm sorry it's you lying here and not me, I love you so much. Edward Cullen, you can not leave me again." Bella cried as she laid her head down next to his arm.

"Bella sweetheart," a voice said from behind as a hand found Bella's back. Bella lifted her head up to see Esme.

"I'm sorry I took so long," Bella said standing up wiping the tears quickly from her cheeks.

"Dear, you weren't taking to long, we're just worried about you," Esme smiled as she took Bella into her arms.

"I'm so sorry," Bella cried into Esme's shoulder.

"Bella, dear, this is not your fault," Esme said rubbing her back to try to calm her. "Your dad is outside and said that Edward's car was hit by a driver who ran a red light. There was nothing he could have done."

"I just…what if he doesn't make it. The last thing I did when I saw him was yell at him. No I love you, no good-bye. I yelled at him," Bella sobbed as she tried to catch her breath.

"Bella, look at me," Esme said pulling back from their embrace. Bella looked up at her with sorrow in her eyes. "Edward knew that you loved him. He knows that you'll always love him. Sure you might not have left each other the way you wanted to, but he's going to be alright. He's going to wake up and see you standing there and you two will work whatever it is out. You two have been through a lot lately and trust me when I say that it will only make your relationship stronger."

"Thank you," Bella whispered. She needed to hear encouragement. Edward was strong. He wasn't one to give up so easily. "I should let everyone else come in." Esme let go of Bella smiling sweetly as Bella left the room.

The rest of the family went in one by one to see Edward until visiting hours were over. Bella begged Jacob to let her stay the night. She wanted to be there if and when Edward woke up.

"Alright, but only because you're my best friend, Bells," Jacob smiled. It was the first time he'd smiled since she had gotten there. "I'm so sorry for everything. I'm sorry for being a jerk, I'm sorry for hurting you the way I did, I'm sorry for showing up at the wedding. I didn't mean to upset Edward that way. It's my fault he left, and I will never forgive myself for that."

"Oh Jake," Bella cried as she wrapped her arms around his waist pressing her cheek against his chest.

"He's going to be OK. I just know it," Jake said into her hair. Bella hoped that he was right. She may have gotten Jacob back in her life, but if that meant losing Edward for good, she wasn't ready for that.

* * *

**A/N: Sorry this chapter is so short, but I kind of felt bad for leaving you two chapters with a cliff hanger. I know that this one is kind of one too, but not as bad as the others. **

**Feedback is GREATLY appreciated!!!!!**


	7. The Letter

**I'm terribly sorry for the lack of updates. I've been going through a huge writer's block, as well as studying for finals, moving to a new house, moving home from school, and trying to get ready to move to England in Jan. lol So, I apologize and hope that ya'll are still with me! lol**

* * *

**Previously**

"_He's going to be OK. I just know it," Jake said into her hair. Bella hoped that he was right. She may have gotten Jacob back in her life, but if that meant losing Edward for good, she wasn't ready for that. _

………**.**

"Don't touch her," Bella heard from behind her. She whirled around to see Edward glaring at the pair of them, arms wrapped around each other. It had been two weeks since Edward's surgery and in that two weeks Jacob had been Bella's only strength. He assured her Edward would wake up, assured her everything would be OK. If it weren't for Jake, Bella didn't know if she would be there when Edward woke up. Seeing Edward lying there lifeless suffocated her. It took all her strength to keep breathing when the reason for the air she breathed was lying before her unmoving. Not knowing when and if she would ever see those gorgeous emerald eyes she fell in love with. But, she did. She saw anger and fear in his eyes.

"Edward," Bella gasped as she ran to his side taking his face in her hands as she covered it with kisses. Bella's heart was pounding in her chest as she felt his hands on top of hers. She missed his touch. Her body ached for it as Edward slid his right hand behind her neck pulling her lips to his. Her lips moved with his as her hands tangled in his hair. She loved the feeling of his lips against hers. The two of them were caught up in each other forgetting they had an audience until they heard him clear his throat. Bella pulled back placing her forehead against Edward's, her eyes still closed.

"I love you," Edward whispered. Bella shuttered feeling his warm breath on her face. She was hoping that this wasn't a dream. That her Edward was really awake and responsive. He leaned back placing a kiss on her forehead before looking up at the man standing behind Bella.

"Good to see you awake, Edward," Jacob said as he walked over to the other side of the bed.

"What is he doing here?" Edward growled paying no attention to Jacob.

"He saved your life, Edward," Bella said stroking his cheek, his face was red with anger.

"Edward, I'm sorry for everything. I was stupid and a coward and I know you probably won't be able to forgive me, but I just…I'm sorry about everything," Jacob said hoping Edward would forgive him for hurting him and Bella.

"Do you have any idea what you put her through?" Edward glared. Every time Bella felt pain, he felt it too. He didn't understand how Jacob could be so selfish.

"I do now. I've apologized to her over and over for the past two weeks gaining her forgiveness even though I don't deserve it. I just want you to know that I will never hurt either of you, ever again." Jacob said looking between the two of them.

"Please get out," Edward said dryly. He couldn't stand to look at him. Even if he did save his life. What he did to Bella didn't deserve forgiveness. Not by her, and certainly not by him. Jacob looked down at the floor before leaving the two alone.

"I didn't need his help. He should have just let me die," Edward said softly. Before Bella realized what she was doing she brought her hand up slapping Edward across the face.

"Don't. You. Dare." Bella warned. "Don't you dare say that to me! Do you have any idea what you put me through? Why do you say things like that? Do you really not what me anymore?" Bella was shaking as tears streamed down her face. Not ones of happiness that Edward was awake and alert, but ones of anger and terror that Edward would have rather died than to be saved by Jacob.

"I'm sorry," Edward whispered as he lowered his head. It wasn't that he didn't want Bella anymore. She was the only one he wanted, but he felt that she deserved better. Someone who could make her happy. Someone who wouldn't keep disappointing her.

Someone who wouldn't make her cry.

"For the love of all that's holy, would you stop apologizing!" Bella yelled. She had heard him apologize for the past week and she was sick and tired of it. That's all he ever did anymore. Apologize for the things that he did. All she wanted him to do was stop being so stupid and be the man she fell in love with. She wanted _her _Edward back! "Where is the man I fell in love with? I know he's in there." Bella grabbed his face between her hands as she searched his eyes. There was no longer that sparkle that had been there before the wedding incident.

"I just…I don't know. I'm sorry," Edward said pulling his face away from Bella's grasp.

"You need to figure out what it is you want. I already know what I want, and he's lying right here. But, if I'm not what you want, then please tell me so I can move on with my life!" Bella demanded. She didn't want anyone else, but if she weren't what he wanted then she would respect his wishes. She just wanted him to be happy, and he wasn't happy.

Bella stood there for a few moments watching his expression turn from sadness to shame and guilt. A tear rolled down her cheek as she realized what she had to do. "Goodbye, Edward," Bella whispered as she turned to leave the room.

Bella felt her life slipping away again. The air being knocked out of her lungs. She was gasping for breath as she closed to door to his room, collapsing to the cold tile floor. She didn't want this. She wanted to be strong for him, she wanted to tell him that they would get through this together. But, she knew that he needed to do this alone. He needed to figure out who he was again and what he wanted. Being there with him would only complicate things entirely.

……….

"Alice, I need to do this. I have to move on, and you and I both know that staying here isn't going to help that process," Bella stated as she continued packing up her things. She had already said goodbye to Charlie, Jacob, and the rest of the Cullen's. Now, she just had to get through the goodbye's with Alice and Emmett.

"But Bella, you're just running away," Alice said sitting on Bella's bed. She refused to assist her best friend at her attempt at running away from her friends and family. Even if it was to get over a broken heart.

"Alice, I'm not running away! I'm moving forward. Being this close to him is not good for either of us." Bella was tired of explaining herself to everyone. She'd made up her mind and there was no turning back now. "And plus, it's not like I'm never coming back. I'll be back to visit, my family is here." The Cullen's have been and always will be Bella's family.

"You better! Or I'll drag you back here myself!" Alice demanded.

"You know I will. Don't forget that you're coming out there next week!" Bella stated. She was scared to death of living in a new city for the first time, but having Alice come help her get settled in would hopefully help calm her nerves.

"I know, and I'm definitely looking forward to it! New York City has fabulous shopping and shoes!! Oh the shoes!" Alice squealed. Bella rolled her eyes. "You know you should tell him, don't you?" Alice's expression turned serious.

"I know, please give this to him," Bella said as she reached in her purse and pulled out a white envelope. She spent all of the previous night trying to figure out how she was going to tell Edward she was leaving. It had been a month since he'd woken up from his accident and they hadn't spoken. There were numerous times that she wanted to call him, but knew that she needed to give him time. She hoped that he would eventually come around and contact her. She had gotten a job offer with Waller Co., a PR firm in New York City that worked with nonprofit medical organizations. She knew she couldn't continue working at the same hospital Edward worked at without losing her mind, so she decided to take the job, needed a new change of pace and a new start.

"Bella, don't you think telling him face to face is a better idea?" Alice asked.

"I can't. If I saw him I wouldn't be able to do this, Alice. Please, just make sure he gets it," Bella said as she taped up her last box. Alice nodded her head without another word.

"Is this the last of it?" Emmett asked as he carried the last few boxes to Bella's Chevy Tahoe. Bella nodded her head. Emmett placed the last box into the back of the Tahoe, slamming the tailgate shut. "I'm gonna miss you, Bells."

"I'm gonna miss you too, Em," Bella smiled as Emmett swept her up in his arms hugging her tightly. "Em…can't…breathe."

"Sorry," Emmett smiled loosening his grip and setting her down on the ground.

"Promise me you'll come visit," Bella said. Other than Alice, Bella would miss Emmett the most. He always knew how to make her laugh even if it caused her much embarrassment.

"Scouts honor," Emmett said straightening up holding his three middle fingers up to the side of his grinning face. Bella winked before she walked over to Alice.

"One week, Alice," Bella said softly as to two hugged.

"One week," Alice repeated. It took every ounce of strength to not shed a tear in front of her two best friends. But, Bella was stronger than she thought.

"Tell Jazz, I'm sorry I didn't get to see him before I left. And that I'll miss him terribly," Bella said. She was disappointed that Jasper had to work the day she was leaving.

"I will," Alice smiled. Bella took one last look at the brother and sister that she was leaving behind. She climbed into her car, buckled herself in, and pulled out of the drive. She took one last glance in her rearview mirror at the two standing there waving. A tear rolled down her cheek as she drove toward her new life. A new beginning.

……….

"Alice," Edward said as he opened the door to find his sister standing there, eyes red and puffy. Alice didn't say a word. She held out the envelope that Bella had given her. Edward took it, as Alice turned around to walk away. "Alice?" Alice continued walking. She hadn't spoken a word to her brother since the accident. She knew that if she started, should wouldn't be able to stop the anger and frustration that she had for him.

Edward looked down at the envelope in his hands and saw his name printed on the front in 'her' script. He had wanted to call her countless times in the last month, but didn't think she would give him the time of day. She had been so upset with him the last time they saw each other and she had every right to be. He was messed up. He no longer knew who he was. He kept letting the woman he loved down and every time he saw the hurt and frustration in her eyes a little bit of him would die. He hated hurting her, making her cry. But, it seemed that that was all he had been doing lately, and he hated himself for it. He wanted to be the man she fell in love with. He wanted to make her happy, make her smile but realizing that he wasn't happy just made it that much more difficult. It wasn't that she was the cause of his unhappiness, because she wasn't. He was unhappy because he had fucked things up with her. It was his fault, no one else's.

Edward walked into his study and sat down at his desk. He opened the envelope and pulled out the piece of paper and began reading.

_Edward,_

_I'm sitting here trying to figure out how to explain all the erratic thoughts invading my mind. Should I call you? Should I stop by to see you? What are you thinking about? Am I doing the right thing? Why aren't you happy? How can I make you happy? These are just a small portion of them. Leaving you at the hospital a month ago was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. Seeing you laying there like that, knowing you weren't happy. Knowing that you weren't happy because you thought I wasn't happy. I felt like I was walking away without offering you my support or assistance with the issues you were having. But, I know now that it was the best thing for me to do. I will love you with all of my heart for as long as I live, I hope you know that. _

_When I walked away from you, my confidant, my best friend, my lover, I left my heart. You will always have it and I want you to know that I'm not upset. I do not regret any of the decisions that I've made the past five years with you in my life. You helped me become the determined and confident woman I am today, and I will forever be in your debt. _

_Edward, you will do great things. You may not believe me now, but I know that you will. You're such an amazing person with a huge heart. Just remember, don't give up, don't ever give up! _

_I've been offered a job in New York City working for a PR firm and have decided to take it. NYC! Can you believe it? It's a total dream come true and as much as I wish you were going with me, I have the confidence knowing that because of you I can do anything. I can get through anything. Sure, it scares the shit out of me moving to a city by myself, leaving my friends and family here in Chicago. But, this is what I've been working toward my whole life. If I don't do it now, I will regret it for the rest of my life. _

_I hope that you find what you're looking for. I hope that you find the thing that makes you happy and puts that gorgeous smile on your face. All I want is for you to be happy. I thought that maybe we could get through this together, but this is bigger than you and me. I have to let you do this on your own. You know I'm right. _

_With all my heart,_

_Bella_

_P.S. Come visit me sometime._

_

* * *

_

**A/N: I hope you all like the letter. For me it's always easier for me to express myself through writing instead of speaking. lol So, I thought it would be easier for Bella to tell Edward in a letter. **

**FEEDBACK?? ;)**


	8. Reunion

**This is the last chapter of this story. Please don't hate me, I will do a bit more explaining at the end. **

* * *

_**Previously**_

_I hope that you find what you're looking for. I hope that you find the thing that makes you happy and puts that gorgeous smile on your face. All I want is for you to be happy. I thought that maybe we could get through this together, but this is bigger than you and me. I have to let you do this on your own. You know I'm right. _

_With all my heart,_

_Bella_

_P.S. Come visit me sometime._

……….

_Nine Months Later_

"Bella, I can't get married and not have my best friend standing next to me," Alice whined over the phone.

"I know Alice, and I would be honored to be your maid of honor," Bella said as she continued looking over the history of a new client. She was really enjoying her new job. It was everything and more that she had dreamed of. She had an amazing boss and was opened to new ideas and was willing to give her creative control over her clients.

"Oh Bella! I'm so excited! Can you believe that I'm actually getting married?!" Alice squealed.

"It took him long enough. I was beginning to wonder what his intentions were with you," Bella laughed. "I just have to tell you now, Alice. Since I've only been here for nine months I only have three days off and I need to keep at least one of those for an emergency. So, if you were hoping I could be there every step of the way, I really am sorry. Because you know I would if I could."

"Oh Bella, you know I understand. Plus Rose will be here and so will my mom. So, no worries at all. I will be flying out there in a couple of weeks for your dress fitting and to see you!" Alice smiled. She hated that her best friend hadn't been back to Washington since she left, but she had been working really hard.

"Well, I'm glad you have Rose. Emmett told me he was head over heels for her. I almost peed my pants when he told me that," Bella laughed.

"I think she might come out with me next month," Alice said.

"That would be great!" Bella said. She placed the paper she had been looking over onto her desk and leaned back into her chair. There was a short pause before Alice cleared her throat.

"He's changed," was all she said. Bella closed her eyes knowing full well what she was referring to.

"Alice," Bella sighed. She didn't want to do this now. She was at work and she didn't have time to go into an in depth discussion about him.

"Bella, you gotta believe me," Alice said.

"I do believe you. I just…I can't do this right now," Bella said closing her eyes. She knew that he had changed. She knew that he was doing well, but how she knew was something that she had to keep to herself.

"Alright, well I'll let you get back to work. I love ya," Alice said. She had numerous conversations with Bella giving her small updates on her brother's life. Just broad details like he was doing well at work, he had started seeing a therapist, he wasn't dating anyone.

"Love you too, Alice," Bella said before hanging up the phone. She hated she was keeping secrets from Alice. But, she had promised that what they were doing was better that no one knew about it. She was hesitant about it at first, but he assured her that it would help in the healing process. The healing process for him, but she wasn't sure if he knew that it was also helping her.

………

"She's coming!" Alice chimed as Edward opened his front door.

"Hi Alice," Edward said as he stood back to let his sister in.

"Did you not hear me? Bella is going to be my maid of honor!"

"I heard you. Congratulations," Edward smiled trying to sound excited. It's not that he wasn't excited that he would get to see Bella in three months, but he wasn't sure what it would be like. After a year of not seeing one another, he wasn't sure how he was supposed to act around her or how she would act around him.

"She misses you, you know," Alice smiled sweetly. Bella never said that she did, but she could hear it in her voice when Alice would convince her that it was okay to talk about him. Edward couldn't say anything. He just stood there with thoughts of what she could be doing at that moment. What she was thinking about at that moment. Did she really miss him as much as he missed her. "Don't worry, you'll get to see her soon enough."

"I know Alice. I just…I miss her so much," Edward sighed as he ran his hand through his hair. Alice smiled at him with sympathy.

"Three months big brother, three months," Alice smiled.

……….

"Bella!" Alice squealed as she saw Bella coming down the escalator at the airport. Bella couldn't help but smile as she saw her best friend hopping up and down like a child with a sugar high.

"Hey Alice!" Bella said as she hugged her. She had missed Alice so much. She had missed home so much.

"Come on, lets get your bags and head home," Alice said as she started to pull Bella toward baggage claim.

It had been a year since Bella had been back in Washington. She had forgotten how much she missed it. She had forgotten how much she missed her family. They pulled up to Alice and Jasper's house thirty minutes after leaving the airport. After Bella left Jasper had asked Alice to move in with him, and they both decided it would be a better investment to go ahead and buy a house. Alice had sent her pictures of the house and Bella thought it was definitely a good fit for the two of them. It was a two bedroom, two and half bath, brick house with a small back yard.

"Alice, those pictures didn't do this house justice. It's adorable," Bella smiled as they pulled into the garage.

"Thanks, Bella. We really love it here!" Alice smiled. Alice grabbed Bella's bag and led her into the house. Bella gasped as she took in her surroundings. The foyer was larger than she expected and Alice has decorated the house in elegant red and golds.

"Alice, it's gorgeous," Bella sighed. Alice not only had an eye from fashion, but she was also very talented in interior design.

"Thanks," Alice smiled as she led Bella back to the guest room. Alice slowly opened the closed door stopping before entering causing Bella to run right into her back.

"Geez Alice, would you warn me when yo-…" Bella stopped as she saw the reason for Alice's abrupt halt.

"Uh…I'll leave you two alone," Alice stammered dropping Bella's bag inside the door before turning around to leave.

Bella stood there in the doorway staring at the figure sitting on the edge of the bed with his elbows on his knees and his hands in his bronze hair. He still hadn't noticed he was no longer alone, so Bella just stood there watching the muscles in his arms relax and contract as he tugged on his hair. She had missed those arms wrapped tightly around her. Bella walked over to him slowly as her heart raced.

"Edward?" Bella whispered. She wasn't sure if she said it loud enough for him to hear until she saw his beautiful green eyes looking up at her. There was a look of surprise and panic in them and she immediately regretted sneaking up on him. "Sorry, I didn't mean…"

"Bella," Edward sighed as he gave her the crooked grin that she had missed so much. He could make her melt into a puddle with just his smile, every single time. Bella walked over to him and placed herself in between his legs. She slowly raised her arms and placed them around his neck lacing her fingers through his hair. She heard him moan and saw his eyelids close.

"I've missed you," Bella whispered. She loved running her fingers through his soft, messy mane. She knew that it helped him relax.

"I've miss you," Edward said as he placed his hands on the back of her thighs as he looked up into her brown eyes. "So much." He couldn't believe that she was really there. He had been waiting for her to get back from the airport. He had talked to Jasper and he told him that Alice had left to go pick her up, so Edward rushed over to wait for them to get back. He didn't realize how nervous he was about seeing her until he got there. He paced around the guestroom for thirty minutes trying to figure out what he would say to her. If she was willing to try again?

"Are we really going to this?" Bella asked. She was hoping that he meant what he said. She was still irrevocably in love with him and would always be no matter what. But, she needed to hear it from his lips.

"I want this. I want you, for the rest of my life. I always have. I just needed to realize that I cannot live without you. You are my life," Edward said as he ran his hands up and down the back of her thighs causing her to close her eyes. "I love you, Isabella Swan."

"I love you, Edward Cullen," Bella smiled as she leaned down brushing her lips against his for the first time in a year.

* * *

**I apologize for not updating in forever. I seriously have been having trouble with writers block and the fact that Christmas was happening and I had family in town that I hadn't seen in 8 years. But, I hope that things will be getting back to normal for a few weeks, anyway. I am moving to England in three weeks and I'm not sure if I'll have much time to write, so I'm going to try to get a lot out within that time. So, just bare with me.**

**As for ending the story here. I got this idea a few weeks ago and have been working on the sequel already. Yes, there is more to this, but I had to end this here because of it. I'm trying something new, so please just bare with me. I'm almost done with the first chapter of the sequel called "Letters from the Heart". I will try to get it posted tomorrow. Just an FYI, there will be two more parts to this story. So, be expecting another addition to it after "Letters from the Heart" is over. heehee**

**As for "Last Train Home" I'm definitely stuck and am not sure when I'll be finishing it. It may be before I leave or it may not be. We shall see. I'm also in the process of starting another story. It will be short, probably like 5 or 6 chapters, but it's an idea I had when I was at work for 5 hours and bored out of my mind. lol **

**PLEASE REVIEW!!! I LOVE HEARING YOUR THOUGHTS!!!!**


	9. Necessary AN

I'm really sorry it's taken me this long to do this. An author's note. But, alas it must be done. Seeing as how it's been months since I've posted anything new. First I want to thank all of you who read my stories. I love all the comments I get, even if they are one liners. Some of those are the best ones I get. I'm really appreciative that you all actually like my writing when I find it elementary at times. Secondly, this is not a farewell to my writings. I will be back eventually, I'm just not really sure how long it will be until I come back.

I've been going through a lot lately. I thought being out of school would be awesome. And don't get me wrong I love not having homework or having to study for tests. And when people tell you to "stay in school. The real world sucks." LISTEN TO THEM!!! haha Also have been going through some family stuff. My grandma passed away September 23, 2009 after a three-year battle with liver cancer. During the few months prior to her death and the few months after, I've been in a bit of a depression and I'm slowly pulling myself out of that. (Shit…watery eyes…ok controlled. lol)

With all that said. There about a 53% chance that I will be moving to South Korea within the next month. So, as far as my writings go, I'm not sure how much of that I'll be able to do. I've been getting back into reading Fan Fics, trying to find some sort of inspiration, it's just hard getting it back.

So, I appreciate those of you who are sticking it out with me….even if it's just one. I started working on a one-shot before my grandma's health started to rapidly decline and I'm hoping to start back up with it in hopes to get where I need to be with my other stories. So…wish me luck!!!!!

Take care.

Asianpersuassion


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